First weekend since I came back...I survived. Went out on Friday for dinner and drinks with an old mate from hotel school, got home, felt empty. Saturday, saw a few potential units, caught up with a friend in the afternoon till early evening, went home, felt empty. Sunday, heard mass, cooked lunch for a guest who came over my place, met someone at coffee shop while I wait for a good mate. Enjoyed myself...went home, felt empty. Trying to trace where the emptiness is coming from...it's from homesickness, suddenly on my own after a month of being with family. Also, from grieving about something that has fallen apart. I appreciate the fact that I've got friends around to keep me company. I am ok when I'm with friends but start to feel empty when I'm alone. I know this is a process I have to go through I just wish I can honestly say I am completely happy on my own just like I used to be two years ago but I can't at the moment. I wanna do something new, something exciting, a lot of things in my mind but I'm just scared I might be doing some drastic changes. Well, atleast I'm glad it's now late in the evening, weekend's nearly over. Start of another week tomorrow......